Finite Influence

This is something I’m not sure I’ve got the guts to write. It seems true to me, yet it seems so out of place. It’s hard because it goes against a lot of what I belive, but I think there has to be something more.

In June of 199…something.. 7? I was walked through the tenets of having a personal relationship with Jesus. I said “yes.”

Over the past 13 years, I’ve talked with people about having a personal relationship with Jesus. I’ve convinced people to make that decision.

Last week I listened to a reputable Christian leader attribute the deficient (Christian) spiritual condition of America to a lack of personal relationships with Jesus.

And recently I’ve been wrestling with a challenge issued by another Christian leader, a leader who was reflecting upon the difference between the majority world church and the Western church said the Western church has replaced a “vision for life with Jesus” with a vision of consumer culture, or the American dream, or some tunnel-vision approach to Christian moral correctness.

There are a lot of people who would claim a “personal relationship with Jesus” who don’t have a vision for life with Jesus. What I mean is that, Jesus isn’t the center of their reality. God is not the defining presence of all they do. And yet it seems normal that they go on claiming this ‘personal relationship.’

You see, what happens is that the personal relationship metaphor runs out. It only goes so far, and then the gig is up.

Because Jesus does not need to be (another) personal relationship in your life. He needs to be your reality. Your vision. The hope that sets the tone for the way you approach Life.

I have this fear, deep down, that when we convince people to have a “personal relationship” with Jesus, that in the long run there’s not a whole lot to differentiate that from their personal relationships with their spouse, or their parents, or their friends. He’s someone we love, we care about, and we want to relate well with. We end up wanting to solve our problems with Jesus in the same manner we solve our problems with our spouses.

I have friends. I have intimate relationships. I don’t need God or Jesus to be another friend or intimate relationship. Because that means sometimes I’ll choose Jesus, and sometimes I’ll choose…. Ashley. or Andy. or Bob. I guess what I’m saying is, what’s the danger of putting the God of the Universe in the same relational position as a friend?

A singular, personal relationship ends up being finite. It only goes so far. In some ways I’m defined deeply and influenced wholly by, say, my relationship with my wife. It shapes a lot of decisions and attitudes in my life. But it’s not always there. It’s limited. The way we are shaped by any one relationship will always be limited; there will always be instances where we can leave that influence out. Where it doesn’t pertain to the situation, it doesn’t make a lot of difference.

Now, hear me say that I wholeheartedly agree that we each have to make a decision. We have to commit personally to Jesus, to make a distinct commitment that our lives will be about Jesus.

To let our lives be centered around Jesus.

It can’t just be a personal relationship past that, it has to mean that Jesus becomes the center of our worlds. We have to stop seeing Jesus as a friend, or buddy, or intimate partner that will help us get through life, find happiness, and get to a special place when we die.

When we commit to Jesus, we have to decide that he is now the vision for our life. We now interpret the world through the lens that is Jesus. He is more than a personal relationship, he is reality.

To be honest, we probably like it that way. The “personal relationship” metaphor works for us, so that we can live in ways that are tamed by the culture and have parts of our lives untouched by the Spirit of God. I mean, come on. He’s our close friend. We know he sees it, but we also know that we have a relationship with him—so we can make amends, right? And that’s the most dangerous thing. When we teach others that the God of the Universe can become a personal friend, we may even start to treat him like that’s what he is.

Here’s a sobering question: If you were honest, does your “personal relationship” with Jesus become your primary way of defining who God is? Because it’s good and appropriate to initiate a personal, individual commitment to following Jesus, but I think if our biggest picture concept of God is a personal relationship with Jesus, then our understanding of following him becomes too “me” centered and not enough God-doing-good-in-the-world centered.

So go, go and make a personal commitment to Jesus. But realize that the end is not to have a great personal relationship with Jesus (it doesn’t hurt, but..), the end is to have the world come to interact with, know, and glorify the God of Creation.